Episode Summories

SEASON 1
Cartman Gets an Anal Probe:
The first episode. Cartman gets an anal probe, so thus he's under alien control. Kyle's little brother Ike is abdoucted by these same aliens.
"Stop trying to scare me you guys, it's not working"
"Cartman, there's an 80 foot sattelite dish sticking out of your ass!"

Weight Gain 4000:
Cartman wins an award for some save the plantet contest. His essay though was nothing but a counterfit Walden. Wendy tried everything in her power to get Cartman busted. Cathy Lee comes to town to present Cartman with the award. Mr. Garrison I mean Mr. Hat tries to kill Cathy Lee, but is stopped by Stan and Wendy. Cartman decides to get "buffed up" for the event. So he eats Weight Gain 4000 (may cause irreversabul damage to liver and kidneys). I mean if you thought Cartman was fat before you should of seen him in this episode he magically became Super Duper Extreme Fat Ass El Grande. (I made that up if anyone copies that I know where you live).
"If Dolphins are so smart why do they live in Igloos?"
"Dude, Dolphins don't live in igloos."

Volcano:
The boys are going camping with Stan's Uncle Jimbo and his war buddy, Ned. Jimbo to Kenny and ignores Stan (who can't kill anything). Cartman tells the "scary" story about Scuzlebut (who has a had of celery, Patrick Duffy for a leg, and weves baskets). Cartman decides to scare everyone by dressing up as Scuzlebut. When they find him lets just put it this Cartman said, "Don't shoot God Damnit." Meanwhile, down in the town, the townspeople find out that the moutain the boys are on is really a volcano. (Just guess how Kenny dies). They decide to build a trench to devert the lava away from the town (it ended in Denver). The boys, Jimbo, and Ned are saved by the real Scuzlebut who weaves a basket. They then jump into the basket and Scuzlebut (with aid from a stick) puts them safely over the trench. In the end Stan kills Scuzlebut.
"I did it, I did it, I finally killed something!"

Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride
Stan gets a dog who's gay. The boys are practicing for a football game. Jimbo gets the entire town to beat on Stan to beat the spread against Middle Park (I think). (Just in case Jimbo rigged a bomb, which he planted on Middle Park's Mascot, that would detonate at a certain note during the half time show. The singer doesn't sing the song correctlly though). Stan's dog runs away because Stan keeps telling Sparky (his dog) to not be gay. So Stan doesn't go to the big game (uh-oh Jimbo, your screwed). Stan finds Sparky at Big Gay Al's Big Gay Animal Sanctuary. Stan wants to bring Sparky back to teach him not to be gay, Al hears this, and brings Stan a boat ride to teach him the wonders/history of gayity. (I think Matt Stone & Trey Parker have something wrong with them). So to make a long story short, no I'm not kidding I do mean to make a long story short, (scary huh?) Stan gets his dog back, gets back to the game, and beats the spread (Jimbo is saved). Stan then gives a speech and shows everyone where the animal sanctuary is (or was in the case). They get their, it's not their but everyone who ever lost an animal finds them (think about that for a second).
"No, it is was cut off by Marty's stupid movie reviews."
"Marty's Movie Reviews are on?"

An Elephant Makes love to a Pig
The science fair is coming up and Terrance (no no the Canadian actor, Mephisto's son) says he's going to clone an entire human being. Kyle said that he's going to splice together the genes of his elephant and Cartman's pot belly pig, fluffy. The boys go up to the gentenic engernering ranch to splice the genes together, unfortuantlly though, "Ah Do-it-do-in pig and an elephant DNA just won't splice." The crazed genetic engener then takes a blood sample from Stan (and the cloning begins). Fluffy and Kyle's elephant get really drunk, Elton John and Chef set the mood, so thus the pig and the elephant get it on all night. After Stan's clone was finished it started to destroy the town and Stan was getting blamed for it. So when Mr. & Mrs. Marsh came home asked him is was on drugs Stan's sister, Shelly, (who keeps trying to kill Stan), says that Stan was with her all the day. Once their parents left the room Stan thanked Shelly and Shelly ran Stan over with a lawnmower. Now back to the real plot: The pig barelly gives birth in time for the END of the science fair, and you wouldn't belive what the offspring of a pig and an elephant looks like
"The pig just gave birth!!!"
"It kinda looks like Mr. Garrison..."

Death
"Happy Birthday" to Stan's Grandpa Marsh who just turned 102. How does the extremlly wizened Mr. Marsh feel about his birthday? He sums it up in one simple sentence; "I wish I were dead." and throught the episode he trys to get his grandson to help him kill himself. However, Stan is aware of a very important thing if he kills his grandfather, he'd be in big trouble, and if he's in trouble he can't watch Terrance and Phillip. Which the parents are trying to get off the air by hurtling themselves through the air at the Catoon Central building (the same day a stomach virus is going throughout the townspeople.
"I killed my grandpa when I was your age, Billy"
"My name's not Billy grandpa!"


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SEASON 1 Cartman Gets an Anal Probe: The first episode. Cartman gets an anal probe, so thus he's under alien control. Kyle's little brother Ike is abdoucted by these same aliens. "Stop trying to scare me you guys, it's not working" "Cartman, there's an 80 foot sattelite dish sticking out of your ass!" Weight Gain 4000: Cartman wins an award for some save the plantet contest. His essay though was nothing but a counterfit Walden. Wendy tried everything in her power to get Cartman busted. Cathy Lee comes to town to present Cartman with the award. Mr. Garrison I mean Mr. Hat tries to kill Cathy Lee, but is stopped by Stan and Wendy. Cartman decides to get "buffed up" for the event. So he eats Weight Gain 4000 (may cause irreversabul damage to liver and kidneys). I mean if you thought Cartman was fat before you should of seen him in this episode he magically became Super Duper Extreme Fat Ass El Grande. (I made that up if anyone copies that I know where you live). "If Dolphins are so smart why do they live in Igloos?" "Dude, Dolphins don't live in igloos." Volcano: The boys are going camping with Stan's Uncle Jimbo and his war buddy, Ned. Jimbo to Kenny and ignores Stan (who can't kill anything). Cartman tells the "scary" story about Scuzlebut (who has a had of celery, Patrick Duffy for a leg, and weves baskets). Cartman decides to scare everyone by dressing up as Scuzlebut. When they find him lets just put it this Cartman said, "Don't shoot God Damnit." Meanwhile, down in the town, the townspeople find out that the moutain the boys are on is really a volcano. (Just guess how Kenny dies). They decide to build a trench to devert the lava away from the town (it ended in Denver). The boys, Jimbo, and Ned are saved by the real Scuzlebut who weaves a basket. They then jump into the basket and Scuzlebut (with aid from a stick) puts them safely over the trench. In the end Stan kills Scuzlebut. "I did it, I did it, I finally killed something!" Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride Stan gets a dog who's gay. The boys are practicing for a football game. Jimbo gets the entire town to beat on Stan to beat the spread against Middle Park (I think). (Just in case Jimbo rigged a bomb, which he planted on Middle Park's Mascot, that would detonate at a certain note during the half time show. The singer doesn't sing the song correctlly though). Stan's dog runs away because Stan keeps telling Sparky (his dog) to not be gay. So Stan doesn't go to the big game (uh-oh Jimbo, your screwed). Stan finds Sparky at Big Gay Al's Big Gay Animal Sanctuary. Stan wants to bring Sparky back to teach him not to be gay, Al hears this, and brings Stan a boat ride to teach him the wonders/history of gayity. (I think Matt Stone & Trey Parker have something wrong with them). So to make a long story short, no I'm not kidding I do mean to make a long story short, (scary huh?) Stan gets his dog back, gets back to the game, and beats the spread (Jimbo is saved). Stan then gives a speech and shows everyone where the animal sanctuary is (or was in the case). They get their, it's not their but everyone who ever lost an animal finds them (think about that for a second). "No, it is was cut off by Marty's stupid movie reviews." "Marty's Movie Reviews are on?" An Elephant Makes love to a Pig The science fair is coming up and Terrance (no no the Canadian actor, Mephisto's son) says he's going to clone an entire human being. Kyle said that he's going to splice together the genes of his elephant and Cartman's pot belly pig, fluffy. The boys go up to the gentenic engernering ranch to splice the genes together, unfortuantlly though, "Ah Do-it-do-in pig and an elephant DNA just won't splice." The crazed genetic engener then takes a blood sample from Stan (and the cloning begins). Fluffy and Kyle's elephant get really drunk, Elton John and Chef set the mood, so thus the pig and the elephant get it on all night. After Stan's clone was finished it started to destroy the town and Stan was getting blamed for it. So when Mr. & Mrs. Marsh came home asked him is was on drugs Stan's sister, Shelly, (who keeps trying to kill Stan), says that Stan was with her all the day. Once their parents left the room Stan thanked Shelly and Shelly ran Stan over with a lawnmower. Now back to the real plot: The pig barelly gives birth in time for the END of the science fair, and you wouldn't belive what the offspring of a pig and an elephant looks like "The pig just gave birth!!!" "It kinda looks like Mr. Garrison..." Death "Happy Birthday" to Stan's Grandpa Marsh who just turned 102. How does the extremlly wizened Mr. Marsh feel about his birthday? He sums it up in one simple sentence; "I wish I were dead." and throught the episode he trys to get his grandson to help him kill himself. However, Stan is aware of a very important thing if he kills his grandfather, he'd be in big trouble, and if he's in trouble he can't watch Terrance and Phillip. Which the parents are trying to get off the air by hurtling themselves through the air at the Catoon Central building (the same day a stomach virus is going throughout the townspeople. "I killed my grandpa when I was your age, Billy" "My name's not Billy grandpa!" Pinkeye The mighty space station MIR >snicker< falls on Kenny (gee what a surprise). Due to a freak accident with Worcestershire sauce, Kenny comes back to life as a pink-eyed infested zombie, ends up biting some doctors, and before you know it theres a full fledged pink eye epidemic! Damien Damien the son of the devil comes to South Park, hence the title of the episode. If you listen closely you hear a little bit of Satan's involvment in the Gulf War (think of later episodes & movie). Cartman has his birthday party, Kenny becomes a platypus, and Satan fights Jesus. Starvin Marvin The boys want a Tako Sports Watch, so they sponser a starving Ethipoian, but the Ethopian is delievered instead of the watch. Turkeys attack the town, Cartman goes to Ethopia and Kenny dies.